Goal Setting GONE WRONG
Why your goals keep failing
One of the many things I see in coaching is a lack of understanding when it comes to goal setting. Unrealistic goals. Unrealistic timelines. Lack of margin for REAL LIFE.
By default… people set “bad” goals and have this unrealistic expectation that EVERYTHING in life will work perfectly over the next 6–18+ months, leaving no margin for the unexpected. If you’ve lived any life, you know you should be expecting the unexpected. So why are you not building this MARGIN into your goals?
Comparison?
Lack of THINKING and PLANNING?
Unrealistic expectations?
Let me share another perspective with you. I had the chance to share this insight on goal setting the other day with my DO HARD THINGS COMMUNITY. We meet up a few times a year in person for challenges and on Zoom weekly for accountability. This whole group is thriving!
One of the guys asked—“Do you think I can qualify for the Boston Marathon?” And here’s my exact response, which might surprise you…
“To qualify for Boston at 44–49 years old… that’s 7:38 per mile over 26 miles.
What does a person need to become to run 7:38 per mile over 26 miles?
To start—the person must REALLY enjoy running. He’ll need to run 45–60+ miles per week.
He will need to scale to run that per week to do so injury-free. Build in margin for that.
TIME… do you have that time to do so? Plus recovery + strength. It’s not just run time but recovery + strength-build time (so expect 50% more time on top of running bare minimum). Being 45+, it is especially important to keep up on mobility and strength training for injury prevention!
TIMELINE… what’s the timeline? If it currently takes you 5+ hours to run a marathon, REALISTICALLY… what kind of time will it take to get to 3 hr & 50 min? 1 year? 2 years? Do you have margin built in for natural setbacks of real life?
The real question is not “IF” or even “WHEN”—it’s WANT.
Does said person really WANT to dedicate said time, energy, and effort over ALL the other things that once had that time, energy, and effort?”
My friends reading this… let me tell you something! You can accomplish ANYTHING you set your mind to. With enough time, energy, effort, obsession—anything is possible for you. But here is what you must realize: you will sacrifice parts of the man you are in order to achieve such goals.
If you’re a family man, you might just be sacrificing time with your kids. If it’s not TIME, it might be energy you have for the kids. It really depends on your schedule, and you will need to be brutally honest with yourself to know this for sure. You may be sacrificing that side business or job promotion. You may be sacrificing your free time and some peace of mind.
Then again—it may be the exact thing you need in this next season of life! It very well may be the exact type of challenge you need to level up in all areas of life.
It’s not IF… it’s not WHEN… it’s WANT! Do you really want to sacrifice X or Y? It may be a good trade. It may be an awful trade. But you must be brutally honest with yourself. Everything in the universe is working toward balance. If you choose this goal, does it set you up? Or set you back? Do you REALLY want to spend your mundane… Tuesdays… Wednesdays… Thursdays… (real daily life) going after this goal?
Be honest!
Get out of dream state.
Get in touch with reality.
THEN decide: Do I really WANT this?
DO HARD THINGS.
GO AFTER MEANINGFUL GOALS.
This is an important read!
Great post. I want to do all of the things, but I can’t. Sad reality check.